Dear Britney

Last night I saw Britney Spears in concert. This is not something I ever really expected to do because I have always had a love/hate relationship with the pop megastar. I idolized her as a little girl when "Baby One More Time" came out. Then I hated her for supposedly getting a boob job at age 18. I was a very righteous kid. Along with NSYNC, I made a habbit of hating her and ridiculing her every chance I got by calling her "Booby Spears." Mature, I know. But amidst all this fervent hatred, I never stopped loving her catchy music. Loathe her as I did, I still bought her CDs with my allowance money. My harsh feelings lessened as I got older, and I started to feel sorry for her more than anything. When she finally went cray cray and shaved her head, the constant barrage of stories about her on Perezhilton became a great source of entertainment. Even though she was way off her rocker, I always hoped she'd make a comeback. So after K Fed, two kids, head shaving, driving listlessly around LA, speaking in British accents at gas stations, Osama, and Adnan, Britney is finally back. She even got her killer body back! Or at least 98% of it. There was a SLIGHT muffin top and a TINY pooch on her lower belly, but it made her look like a real girl who just happens to be in pretty damn good shape. It is my new goal to somehow look like her. In conclusion, congratulations, Ms. Spears, for going from being a hot crazy mess to a more or less normal pop star.